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1995-08-20
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Path: newserv.ksu.ksu.edu!moe.ksu.ksu.edu!vixen.cso.uiuc.edu!sdd.hp.com!spool.mu.edu!agate!usenet.ins.cwru.edu!ns.mcs.kent.edu!news.ysu.edu!malgudi.oar.net!infinet!dionisio
From: dionisio@infinet.com (Denny Miller)
Newsgroups: alt.startrek.creative,infinet.general
Subject: The top 15 reasons ST-TNG was cancelled (fwd)
Date: 28 Jun 1994 06:01:50 GMT
Organization: InfiNet Systems, Columbus, Ohio, USA
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Couldn't resist forwarding this. (Ah the wonders of mailing lists!)
_____________________________________
_________| |________
\ | The Top 5 List | /
\ | | /
> | June 27, 1994 | <
/ |_____________________________________| \
/___________) (__________\
The Top *15* Reasons "Star Trek - The Next Generation" Was Cancelled
15> Time slot needed for "A Team - The Next Generation."
14> When Worf gets more chicks than the Captain, it's time
to hang it up.
13> Data captured by Jabba the Hut, sold to Darth Vader
for "recreational purposes."
12> Too many cameramen blinded while focusing on Picard's head.
11> Picard's affection for tequila starting to get ugly.
10> Enterprise crew members afraid of falling off the edge
of the universe and being eaten by dragons.
9> Network execs must have been out of their Vulcan minds.
8> Never one to back down on a dare, Data chases a shot of matter
with a shot of anti-matter and KABLOOIE! No more universe!!
7> United Federation of Planets disbands after election of new
General Secretary, Boutros Boutros Boutros Boutros Boutros
Boutros Boutros Boutros Boutros Boutros Boutros Ghali.
6> Data failed to get much-needed MultiMedia upgrade.
5> Lack of cure for male-pattern baldness by the 23rd century
was just too damn depressing.
4> No actors willing to play new second commander, "Number Two."
3> Uninsured Wesley totaled Enterprise on Spring Break joyride
to Starbase 24.
2> William Shatner rakes set with AK-47 screaming, "Energize
THIS, you bastards!"
and the #1 Reason "Star Trek - The Next Generation" Was Cancelled...
1> Had to make way for spin-off, "Geordi Loves Chachi."
Today's credits:
----------------------------------------------------------------
Wade Kwon, Birmingham, AL - 1
Joseph Funk, San Francisco, CA - 2, 7, 8
Greg Sherwin, Palo Alto, CA - 3
Rick Canales, Austin, TX - 4
Bruce Ansley, Baltimore, MD - 5
Lemon Rinaldi, San Francisco, CA - 6
Steve Maybo, San Diego, CA - 9, 15 (Hall of Fame)
Bill Burnett, Lexington, MA - 10
Chris White, San Diego, CA - 10, 15
Bo Williams, Huntsville, AL - 11
David Pilkington, Lake Forest, IL - 12, Topic
Elliott Schiff, Pittsburgh, PA - 12
Ken Wilson, Kansas City, MO - 13
Ward Bahner, Kansas City, MO - 14
Gary Ross, San Jose, CA - 15
Thanks to all who contributed!
_____________________________________
_________| |________
\ | The Top 5 List | /
\ | Moderated by Chris White | /
\ | San Diego, CA, USA | /
\ | | /
> | Opinions expressed are strictly | <
/ | those of the moderator and his | \
/ | fellow contributors! | \
/ |_____________________________________| \
/___________) (__________\
--
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